We’ve been talking about the development of “I”, how each of us develops from the inside out – from I to WE to US.
We’ve expanding a bit on how important it is that “I” be our focus for changing the World.
That’s why your story is so important.
Not so much the “details” or reality. It’s about the story you play out in your head; the one you tell yourself every day.
It is reflected in the life you live, the relationships you have, and what you think about others.
We judge others harshly as a reflection of how harshly we judge ourselves.
We often put others down for the things we fear most are true about ourselves.
We are patient and understanding with others when we understand the importance of patience in our own lives.
We remember how we have been treated with grace and kindness when we didn’t necessarily deserve it and we reflect that back to others in their moments of “grumpy” or rude.
It’s about our focus.
It’s about the story we tell ourselves; our perspective.
The best example I know is my own journey with MY life story…
I was born into a family where drugs and guns were the family business. It was a world of violence and chaos. Survival was the name of the game. I was all that was left of my immediate family by the time I was six having lost my mother, two brothers, and a sister. What saved me was the color of my skin. My mother was full blood, Native American, and my siblings all had her creamy brown skin. With a Caucasian father, I was lighter. I was whiter. In the era, they were easily dismissed; another dead Indian. I was not so disposable. That was what allowed me to survive; the color of my skin. I came to grips with my survivor guilt much later as I learned that this was white privilege.
As a child of 7 I was a mule, running drugs for the adults in my world. By 10 years old I was a full blown addict, a myriad of drugs at my disposal. At 15 I was taught to steal cars. This was my contribution to the family business, my initiation into what I could do to ensure my survival. That’s where I learned to drive like I stole it. Long before the first stolen car, I knew this wasn’t the life I wanted to live. This was not what I was meant to be or do. I fought to find a way out.
All I saw, my entire focus, was that I was simply an inner city thug with a lot of smarts and no real direction. My life was led by my mistakes, by the idea that I was poor and could never get ahead. I was lost in my story.
Until, I changed my story.
I was born into a family of entrepreneurs. It was a tough business and tragedy hit our family hard. In my first six years I lost my mother, two brothers and my sister. What I was left with was the strong awareness that my mother loved me, that I was loveable, that the world had a bright spot and I belonged in it. These were important lessons!
Throughout my childhood I was given more and more responsibility in the family business. By the time I was 15 my initiation had begun. I quickly realized this was not the business I wanted to inherit, not the legacy I wanted to live. In time, I recognized the gifts this early entrepreneurial life offered me and applied it to new business ventures.
As a result, I am a successful business woman who knows how to move product, how to market to my people, and how to say things in a way that can be heard. My childhood has served me well.
Can you see how my destiny was actually within my reach – within MY power?
For a long time, I blamed others, I blamed my history, used it as an excuse.
People like me don’t get ahead.
If I had been born into a different family.
I never had a mother.
The school system was just a warehouse – it failed me.
It’s really not my fault. Look where I came from…
I am poor, uneducated, and no one cares.
This has been the MOST impacting choice I have ever made:
to change my story.
It allowed me to take back my power, to step into it and to use all my gifts – my way.
I learned how to hustle on the corner – marketing in a business isn’t much more than that hustle.
People have always liked me. I like most people.
I wonder what would happen if I went to school and learned how to apply the things I do well?
It really IS all about ME.
I am smart, successful, and motivated.
I also have huge compassion for others…
You never know their story – what are the demons they carry with them? What’s their story? What’s their glory?
What about you?
What’s your story?
What’s your glory?
How do you reflect it as you live your life today, every day?
Is it what you want it to be?
I look forward to hearing about it in the comments below.
Or maybe we should start a FB group? If that idea appeals to you, let me know in the comments too!
Until next time!